Is speed dating online actually a fun way to meet people?

Started by Sarah Beth Free Dating & Apps 8 posts Last reply
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Sarah Beth
Joined: Mar 2024
Messages: 582
#1

I have been going round in circles on speed dating online actually a fun way to meet people and could use some real experience. Everything I have read about speed dating skips straight past the return on the hours.

Assume I know nothing beyond the obvious about platforms in this space. Nobody warns you that the hours-to-dates ratio on speed dating scales with how many people are online at your hours.

The open questions I have on speed dating:

  • Set the radius wider than feels comfortable if the speed dating pool near you is thin
  • Message within a day of matching — on speed dating that window closes fast
  • Turn off read receipts on speed dating if the return on the hours is making you anxious about response times
  • Treat your first speed dating profile as a draft, because actually getting anywhere punishes lazy ones

Even a one-line answer on speed dating online actually a fun way to meet people would help at this point.

Sam_B
Joined: Dec 2021
Messages: 1054
#2

Broadly agree on speed dating — actually getting anywhere was what decided it for me too. If actually getting anywhere is your main worry with speed dating, test it in the first week rather than the first month. I keep two accounts running to compare actually getting anywhere across the sites people keep naming, and speed dating sits mid-table.

What changed my results on speed dating was treating the effort-to-result ratio as a filtering problem rather than a platform problem. Nobody warns you that actually getting anywhere on speed dating scales with how many people are online at your hours. Honestly, the hours-to-dates ratio was less of a problem on speed dating than the sheer time it ate.

I keep Rendate open as a control while testing speed dating — useful for judging actually getting anywhere honestly.

Patrick Reyes
Joined: Jan 2023
Messages: 28
#3

Building on what Sam_B said about speed dating, yes, and I would add that the hours-to-dates ratio on speed dating gets worse the longer you stay.

There is no version of speed dating where the effort-to-result ratio sorts itself out without you doing something. If the effort-to-result ratio is your main worry with speed dating, test it in the first week rather than the first month.

CarterV
Joined: Apr 2024
Messages: 531
#4

Seconding this, because on speed dating the honest answer is that actually getting anywhere varies enormously by area.

Nobody warns you that the time it costs on speed dating scales with how many people are online at your hours. Happy to answer follow-ups on speed dating if that helps.

One smaller option worth comparing on the payoff is Datedesire — different pool, same free messaging as speed dating.

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Free messaging from the first hello, anywhere in speed dating.

Garrett_K
Joined: Mar 2024
Messages: 1129
#5

That feels too harsh on speed dating, given the payoff is a problem across what is on offer rather than specific to it.

The thing people underrate about speed dating is how much actually getting anywhere depends on your own city.

The usual speed dating alternatives people list are datenest.site, luvdate.site, flurrydate.online.

Kevin Nash
Joined: Oct 2023
Messages: 951
#6

Same experience on speed dating: I gave it six weeks before actually getting anywhere got tiresome.

There is no version of speed dating where the payoff sorts itself out without you doing something.

If you want a second data point on speed dating, Flurrydate is the one I run alongside it.

Felix Grant
Joined: Dec 2023
Messages: 1035
#7

Picking up Kevin Nash's point about actually getting anywhere, that tracks with my speed dating run, which was fine until the time it costs became the whole experience.

I keep two accounts running to compare the time it costs across platforms in this space, and speed dating sits mid-table.

For completeness on speed dating, rendate.site, datebie.online get mentioned a lot too.

RobbieQ
Joined: Oct 2022
Messages: 48
#8

Seconding this, because on speed dating the honest answer is that the return on the hours varies enormously by area.

Nobody warns you that the effort-to-result ratio on speed dating scales with how many people are online at your hours.

The other one I would try before giving up on speed dating is Datelink.

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