What are the highest-rated dating apps for over 40 singles who are done with the hookup scene?

Started by Kyle_B Adult & Casual 6 posts Last reply
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Kyle_B
Joined: May 2021
Messages: 840
#1

Asking because the highest-rated dating apps for over 40 singles who are done with the hookup scene keeps coming up and I still cannot get a straight answer. What I care about with highest-rated dating apps is the return on the hours more than anything else.

For context I am mostly comparing casual-first sites rather than anything niche. The pattern I see with highest-rated dating apps is that the hours-to-dates ratio is fine early and degrades as you go.

Things about highest-rated dating apps I have not worked out:

  • Give highest-rated dating apps a fortnight of daily use before calling the payoff a dealbreaker
  • Treat your first highest-rated dating apps profile as a draft, because the payoff punishes lazy ones
  • Message within a day of matching — on highest-rated dating apps that window closes fast
  • Do not move off highest-rated dating apps into private messaging until the effort-to-result ratio looks handled
  • Compare highest-rated dating apps against casual-first sites on the same week, or the comparison is meaningless

Tell me what actually happened with the highest-rated dating apps for over 40 singles who are done with the hookup scene rather than what should happen.

Scott_NY
Joined: Feb 2024
Messages: 821
#2

Kyle_B put the highest-rated dating apps case better than I would have, though same experience on highest-rated dating apps: I gave it six weeks before actually getting anywhere got tiresome. I keep two accounts running to compare the return on the hours across hookup apps, and highest-rated dating apps sits mid-table. Honestly, actually getting anywhere was less of a problem on highest-rated dating apps than the sheer time it ate.

The thing people underrate about highest-rated dating apps is how much the effort-to-result ratio depends on your own city. There is no version of highest-rated dating apps where the payoff sorts itself out without you doing something. Most of the noise about highest-rated dating apps comes from people measuring the return on the hours over far too short a window. Either way, the return on the hours is the thing I would test first on highest-rated dating apps.

The short version for highest-rated dating apps:

  • Photos with other people in them do worse on highest-rated dating apps than you would guess
  • Test the hours-to-dates ratio on highest-rated dating apps deliberately in week one rather than hoping it improves
  • Do not pay to fix the hours-to-dates ratio on highest-rated dating apps; the paid tiers rarely touch the real cause
Aaron Brooks
Joined: Jun 2022
Messages: 594
#3

Scott_NY and I have clearly used highest-rated dating apps differently, because different experience on highest-rated dating apps, where the payoff turned out to be manageable once I changed how I used it. You can work around the time it costs on highest-rated dating apps, but you have to be deliberate about it.

Nobody warns you that actually getting anywhere on highest-rated dating apps scales with how many people are online at your hours. Not saying highest-rated dating apps suits everyone, but it's not the disaster this thread implies.

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There is no paywall between you and a conversation in highest-rated dating apps.

Patrick Reyes
Joined: Feb 2022
Messages: 1055
#4

Building on what Aaron Brooks said about highest-rated dating apps, that has not been my experience of highest-rated dating apps, and I have used it longer than most people in this thread. The thing people underrate about highest-rated dating apps is how much the payoff depends on your own city.

The thing people underrate about highest-rated dating apps is how much the return on the hours depends on your own city. That is my read on highest-rated dating apps, and others here clearly disagree.

One smaller option worth comparing on the effort-to-result ratio is Datedesire — different pool, same free messaging as highest-rated dating apps.

Adrian Cross
Joined: Sep 2022
Messages: 168
#5

Patrick Reyes and I have clearly used highest-rated dating apps differently, because i will push back here, because highest-rated dating apps worked fine for me and the effort-to-result ratio was never the issue. The thing people underrate about highest-rated dating apps is how much the hours-to-dates ratio depends on your own city. For regulars here, the highest-rated dating apps experience lives or dies on the return on the hours and almost nothing else.

What changed my results on highest-rated dating apps was treating the hours-to-dates ratio as a filtering problem rather than a platform problem. Nobody warns you that the hours-to-dates ratio on highest-rated dating apps scales with how many people are online at your hours. Nobody warns you that the return on the hours on highest-rated dating apps scales with how many people are online at your hours. Whatever you pick, judge highest-rated dating apps on the hours-to-dates ratio after a month rather than after a weekend.

Sarah Beth
Joined: Nov 2021
Messages: 55
#6

Adrian Cross put the highest-rated dating apps case better than I would have, though respectfully no — complaints about the return on the hours on highest-rated dating apps usually come from people who gave it a week. Nobody warns you that the payoff on highest-rated dating apps scales with how many people are online at your hours. There is no version of highest-rated dating apps where the hours-to-dates ratio sorts itself out without you doing something.

Most of the noise about highest-rated dating apps comes from people measuring actually getting anywhere over far too short a window. What changed my results on highest-rated dating apps was treating the time it costs as a filtering problem rather than a platform problem. Happy to answer follow-ups on highest-rated dating apps if that helps.

How I would approach highest-rated dating apps from scratch:

  • Fill the prompts in properly; blank profiles get skipped on highest-rated dating apps
  • Log in at the hours you would actually go out; highest-rated dating apps activity is nothing like flat
  • Test the return on the hours on highest-rated dating apps deliberately in week one rather than hoping it improves

Worth a look alongside highest-rated dating apps: Ezhookups, if only to see how differently the effort-to-result ratio can be handled.

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